Read Ephesians 5:22-33
Discussion starter:
When you read this passage, what feels encouraging? What feels challenging?
Why Does the Husband Lead? (vv. 22–24, 31)
Big Idea: Male leadership is rooted in creation and covenant, not culture.
Read Genesis 2:18–24.
A few observations:
Adam is created first and given the covenant command before Eve is formed (Gen 2:15–17).
Paul quotes Genesis 2:24 in verse 31. His argument is creation-rooted, not Roman-culture rooted.
Headship reflects an ordering built into creation.
Questions:
What do you notice about Adam’s responsibility before and after Eve is created?
Why do you think Paul grounds his teaching on marriage roles in Genesis rather than in cultural norms from his day? Why might it be important for us to do the same?
What can happen in a home when no one clearly bears responsibility before God and roles are not defined?
Men: Do you feel the weight of being accountable to God for your household? Why or why not?
Women: When you hear “submit to your husband,” what emotions surface first — resistance, fear, indifference, trust, something else?
What Kind of Leadership? (vv. 23, 25)
Big Idea: Headship is covenant responsibility for the spiritual good of the family.
Read 1 Corinthians 11:3, and Mark 10:42–45.
A few observations:
Christ is called “head” and “Savior” in verse 23. Headship includes responsibility to protect and preserve.
Leadership in the kingdom is never domination. It is sacrificial initiative.
The husband answers to Christ for how he leads.
Questions:
How is biblical leadership different from passivity? How is it different from control?
What do you think tends to make men abdicate leadership in their household?
How could a wife flourish under Christ-shaped leadership?
The Cost of Leading (vv. 25–30)
Big Idea: The husband’s authority is rooted in being self-sacrificial, and putting his wife before himself.
A few observations:
“Gave himself up” defines leadership.
The goal is her holiness and joy, not his comfort.
Questions:
Men: What would it mean for you to take primary responsibility for your wife’s spiritual flourishing?
Where is leadership hardest: conflict, prayer, discipline, repentance?
Why This Structure Matters (v. 32)
Big Idea: Marriage is a living picture of Christ and the church.
Read Revelation 19:6–8.
A few observations:
Marriage proclaims the gospel.
Christ leads. The church responds.
Distinct roles display a greater reality.
Questions:
How does role distinction make the gospel visible?
What disappears from the picture if roles are erased?
Concrete Application (v. 33)
Ask separately:
For men:
What is one area where you need to take clearer spiritual initiative this week?
Where do you need to repent of passivity or selfishness?
For women:
How can you encourage godly leadership rather than compete with it?
What does joyful respect look like when a husband is imperfect but trying?